September 13, 2010


I know this is not rocket science, but this morning a thought crossed my mind about the way an adopted child becomes FAMILY.

It seems like one day you wake up and realize how far your child has come. I realize how much more a part of the family he/she is than the day, week, month or year before.

Each adopted child has their own time frame and experiences in this process. But there is one common factor I see in them all.


Time solidifies relationships.

Books on attachment are extremely resourceful. Advice from other B.T.D.T. adoptive parents can be like fresh water in a desert land.

But in many cases, time is a vital player in the game. And it's the one thing that requires a lot of patience, because there's no sure fire way to say how much time will pass before a real bond occurs.

I'm not saying one should just sit around and wait, doing nothing to help the attachment process. Not at all!

I guess I'm just realizing how time (and lots of prayer) has strengthened our cords.

Time keeps marching. Our relationships keep changing and growing closer.

Much like in our Christian faith, we are ever growing in our relationship with our Heavenly Father. It's how it is with our children.

Not rocket science, right? Not by a long shot. But maybe it might encourage someone out there who is in the thick of it.


  1. LOVE this, Laine! I always appreciate your insight and words of wisdom.

    Time IS such a big part of it. I realize with each passing day/week/month that our bond with Khloe keeps growing stronger, as is her bond with us. It's clear she is secure in our family now... but I'm learning that as time keeps passing by, it is solidified even more than I realized the month or week prior.

    Yes, time... such a test of patience sometimes. But also a healer if we lean on the ONE who can see us through.

    God bless! <><


    GORGEOUS photos of the family, BTW... love the one on the beach of all eight of your precious kiddos! PRICELESS!!

  2. Oh the truth in the importance of time...
    And how even after I thought we were "there," a few more months pass and I realize we are "closer to there" than we were before.
    I pray this simple truth will encourage someone who is struggling right now!

  3. Great Post!
    Simple yet just the encouragement that many of us need, I am sure.
    Great Photos, BTW! Love the one taken on the beach!